Bethany England’s best goals this season (so far), ranked

One of the things we can do during this hiatus (assuming that is all it will be) is take a look back at all of the things we’ve absorbed, and might’ve forgotten.

And in case you have committed the very egregious crime of forgetting how absurd Bethany England has been this season, I am here to remind you, goal by goal.

7) Bethany England vs. West Ham, February 2, 2020

The thing I love about this goal is how England directs Erin Cuthbert to send the ball when she’s well behind the defender. The speed to burn the CB and agility to evade the keeper made the finish as easy as rolling the ball into an empty net. Also note how dangerous this Chelsea attack is, two passes led to this, the first from their keeper. [Eric Cantona voice] I love football.

6) Bethany England vs. Birmingham City, November 24, 2019

The goal that launched The Streak™. Before this, England had scored just two league goals. She doubled that in this game and decided she would just score in every league match since. In fact, nothing portended her transition into super saiyan better than England turning her right foot into a pillow to bring down a 50-yard diagonal, then turning her left immediately into a hammer.

5) Bethany England vs. Tottenham, September 8, 2019

This was Chelsea and Beth’s first goal of the season, and it only took four minutes because we all hate Spurs that much. Mind you, this is her “weak” foot!

4) Bethany England vs. Arsenal, October 13, 2019

I love a volleyed goal. In fact, the only thing better than a volleyed goal is when a player clips the ball into the air with the sole intention of smashing it. And the only thing better than that is doing it to Arsenal. (Also, hi Fran Kirby! Get well soon!)

3) Bethany England vs. Birmingham City, February 12, 2020

Great strikers design their goals well before the ball comes their way, and you can tell this is exactly what Beth England did to make this goal. The deft touch with her head, while in full stride, to clip the ball into space only she could run onto, burning the CBs, then opening her body to sell the far post hit only to clip it in over the keeper’s shoulder near post. Siri, insert one-thousand fire emojis.

2) Bethany England vs. Arsenal, January 19, 2020

This is the full Bethany England Experience™. Not only scoring against a rival, but calling on a variety of her skills to make the chance then turning even the finish into a work of art. The touch to play this ball ahead when the defender was in a decent position is almost as good as the “weak”-footed strike — almost.

1) Bethany England vs. Manchester City, February 23, 2020

After watching all of the bangers Beth England has scored with her left, you may be wondering what she can do with her right. Well, dear reader, stop reading and watch Beth England smash the ball from at least thirty-yards to beat the best keeper in the WSL.

Beth England is in the midst of a run of scoring in every league match since the 24th of November — and absurd nine-match streak. In between she has also scored vital goals in cup competitions, including the opening and winning goals against Arsenal in the Continental Cup final.

No matter what happens to the rest of the season, England crafting herself into the most dangerous striker in the WSL — a league that includes Vivianne Miedema, and England’s Chelsea teammate Sam Kerr — has been remarkable to watch. When/if the season starts back up, you won’t want to miss her third act.