Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang assaulted in home invasion, robbery — reports

Shocking real world drama entered our safe heaven of fabricated football drama today, with reports of a violent assault and home invasion suffered by Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang. As per the Telegraph, “Aubameyang and his wife were struck in the face in front of their children during a violent armed robbery in the early hours of Monday morning” before the armed thieves made off with some jewelry. Reports in Spain indicate that the family “are fine”, staying in a hotel, and are receiving help and counseling from the club.

It might be a bit crass to segue into a football topic from here, but as the Telegraph claim, “it is hoped Chelsea will renew talks” over his signature, with the 33-year-old expected to meet with the Barcelona powers that be prior to that to talk things through. Barca have refused a £15m part-exchange offer from Chelsea, wanting more money and less Marcos Alonso, while personal terms with Aubameyang himself may or may not be agreed either, with the former Arsenal and Borussia Dortmund striker possibly looking for a 3-year deal.

This one might go down to the wire, and the events of the past 24-48 hours have only complicated things — and not just in our comfy little football bubble.