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14 ‘Imminent’ Days Later: Real Madrid still within ‘days’ of signing Eden Hazard

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How many days until the heat death of the universe?

Eden Hazard was officially announced as a Chelsea player on June 4, 2012, or a little over 2500 days ago. It’s safe to say that he’s been expected to make the jump to Real Madrid for about 2499 days of those 2500. But that official announcement remains “days” away, according to Marca, just as it was two 14 days ago ... according to Marca.

Uh-oh, someone let the record skip the record skip the record skip...

Now they’re saying the same thing, again, and I was going to ignore it because there’s only so much of this I can handle without losing my appetite, but the Mail and other English outlets have picked up on it today as well, so we’re going to have to mention it.

Yes, if you’ve been living in perfect isolation, here behind your wall, for the past however many days, here’s some news for you: Eden Hazard is probably leaving Chelsea this summer — (unless he has to play Slavia Prague too many more times, as they just might finish the job of kicking his leg right off).

Within days!

DAYS!

D
A
Y
S

(Chelsea season ends on May 12, with the anti-Semitism awareness game on the 15th and a possible Europa League final to follow on May 29. Those are the coming days for the coming days of Eden Hazard’s Real Madrid days.)