Marcos Alonso wanted by Real Madrid, Atlético this summer and next — report

“Marcos Alonso is a soccer player who likes both meringues and mattresses” begins the Google Translated report from Diario AS. And that makes perfect sense. Meringue is delicious, whether on pie, in a cookie, or as part of a macaron. And mattresses are comfy and certainly beat sleeping on the floor, though they may not be superior to sleeping on a bed of meringue. That would certainly bring a whole new meaning to breakfast in bed and ensure sweet, sweet dreams indeed.

AS are of course referring to Real Madrid (who play in white, which is also the color of meringue, and thus... ‘Los Merengues’ — or Los Blancos, if you’re not into the food similes) and Atlético Madrid (‘Los Colchoneros’ — literally, the mattress-makers as apparently mattresses used to be red-white striped in Spain?). Both teams are said to be eyeing Marcos Alonso and not just because of his luscious hair or his assumed €30m price tag. He is, claims the report, “the best defender of the Premier League last season” — an assessment that seems predicated entirely on his goalscoring output.

That alone puts the entire report into quite dubious light, but let’s take another bite.

Real Madrid don’t necessarily need their academy product back, but could use his versatility as (“a luxury”) backup to Marcelo and in the center of defense as well. Atlético, on the other hand, might be more desperate since Filipe Luis is being linked with a move to PSG and they’d need a replacement before the end of the month. While the report acknowledges that Atléti have not made any moves yet and that Chelsea are highly unlikely to sell since the Premier League’s transfer window is already closed and Alonso still has three years left on his contract, it also assures that both teams will be back next summer, and then, they might actually mean business.

Many have expected Alonso to take a back seat to Emerson with Sarri in charge, but so far, the former Fiorentina man hasn’t missed a beat in converting (back) to a full back from a Conte-special wing-back. Chances are, he will continue to hog the vast majority of minutes on that flank for at least this season once again, while continuing his rather ridiculous goal-scoring/assisting habit that’s made him the most productive defender in that regard in the league since his arrival at the club.