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WATCH: Kai Havertz, Mason Mount find their shooting boots for not Chelsea

THEY DO EXIST

England v Germany: UEFA Nations League - League Path Group 3 Photo by Eddie Keogh - The FA/The FA via Getty Images

Mason Mount and Kai Havertz have one (1) whole goal between the two of them so far this season for Chelsea — that’s 16 appearances all told. On Monday, they combined for three (3!) goals in just one (1) whole game! Clearly, the secret was to have them play against each other in a meaningless international pseudo-friendly.

Neither England nor Germany had anything to play for tonight at Wembley, and after a scoreless first half, decided to have some fun and scored three goals each. Germany went up two, then England stormed back to take the lead, before Havertz leveled things one last time in the final few minutes with his second goal of the night.

But it was Havertz’s first goal that was the talk of the night, a veritable worldie from our erstwhile King. (Old friend Timo Werner credited with the “assist”.)

England were already going down to Nations League B but pride eventually kicked in. Reece James (who played the full game) set up Luke Shaw for their first, with Mount leveling things just a few minutes later — also a pretty great goal. Mount had been on the pitch less than 10 minutes, having replaced Raheem Sterling (who should’ve also scored). (Ben Chilwell, again, did not feature.)

The Three Lions looked set for a first win in six when Harry Kane scored another penalty, but Havertz had different ideas, this time knocking in a rebound after following up Serge Gnabry’s shot. Solid center forward instincts from Kai!

In the group’s other final game, Italy denied Hungary a place in the Nations League final four with a 2-0 win in Budapest. Jorginho played a little over 70 minutes in what was a fairly straightforward win for the Azzurri.

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