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Batsman Begins in Valencia as Michy spreads his wings at Murciélagos training

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The hero we need ... but not the one we deserve at the moment.

A bat statue from circa 1900 in Valencia, Spain
Photo by Xavier TESTELIN/Gamma-Rapho via Getty Images

The Bats-man has joined The Bats, to play in a city with a bat on its coat of arms. It’s a match made in self-referential heaven and while Batshuayi claims he chose to join Valencia (nicknamed Los Murciélagos, which literally means The Bats) over other potential suitors because of a conversation with their head coach and because of Champions League football ... he’s quite cleraly enjoying all the synergistic symbolism, too.

Michy might always be more known for his social media engagement, but his goal-scoring talents, when allowed to flourish, are undeniable. He scored 19 times last season, split almost evenly (10 vs. 9), over 39 appearances, split not at all evenly (25 vs. 14, though just about equal in terms of minutes) between Chelsea and Borussia Dortmund, respectively.

One does wonder how this season would’ve turned out for him had he not gotten hurt at the end of last season, which probably played a role in BVB passing on him. But now, having once again chosen to leave Chelsea on loan, he has an entire European season ahead of him to show his qualities, and maybe convince Sarri or whoever might be in charge next summer that he can be relied on to be more than just a backup.

And so, as Michy spreads his Bats-wings in Valencia, we keep our vigilance. For he is the hero we need, but perhaps not one we deserve at the moment.