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Gary Cahill claims Chelsea aren’t robots, but won’t be affected mentally by Spurs loss

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Bee-boop bop.

Tottenham Hotspur v Chelsea - Premier League
Slightly disingenuous picture selection on my part; Cahill’s actually taken a knock here.
Photo by Catherine Ivill - AMA/Getty Images

After Chelsea’s Premier League record-equalling 13-match winning streak came to an end on Wednesday, Gary Cahill dropped a bombshell on us all by claiming that the players aren’t robots.

Well of course that’s what they’d want us to think! I’ve seen the Cylons, Gary. They look like us now! Can’t fool me!

“We are not robots.”

-Gary Cahill; source: Evening Standard

Of course, just one look at some of the giveaways, defensive errors, and disappointing finishing against Spurs would confirm Cahill’s diagnosis of Chelsea’s biological origins. With Kanté’s guidance GPS uncalibrated, Eden Hazard’s targeting computer turned off, César Azpilicueta forgetting his go-go-gadget-neck at home, and Pedro set to random shuffle, it’s a wonder the match was as even as it eventually turned out to be, two perfect Dele Alli headers aside.

“I thought we could have gone to that next level. I felt like we weren't quite as sharp, we weren't quite as quick as we have been — a few misplaced passed, a few heavy touches.”

"We were a little bit short of the levels that we've set this season. You can't be short at places like this. Credit to them, they did well and got the result.”

"We're disappointed with that but it's after a run that's been fantastic. It's one game. It won't affect us mentally."

-Gary Cahill; source: FourFourTwo

If you say so, Cahill-bot.

The older, soon to be obsolete and decommissioned model of Chelsea Captain also chimed in on social media, having completed his 90-minute observation brief from the stands.

That’s great and all, but can we stop using “we go again” as our slogan? All I can think of is Steven Gerrard every time I hear that.