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The Daily Hilario: Matchweek 35

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Your daily dose of off-topic shenanigans.

WaFFLe:
3rd vs. 9th:  Club Deportivo Real FC Dale United vs. DP's All-Stars
1st vs. 11th:  dareNevils vs. Hawkeye FC
6th vs. 5th:  Falcao Punch vs. EMENALO AND THE SNAKE CHARMERS
12th vs. 4th:  Pickled's Foos vs. Langers Athletic
7th vs. 8th:  Taco Bellerin vs. BT Blues
10th vs. 2nd:  Thousand Upper Volta vs. What A Load of Ballacks

OWLS ARE SCARY:

ENGLAND (all times BST):
12.30:  Championship, 24th vs. 4th:  Bolton Wanderers vs. Hull City
15.00:  Championship, 6th vs. 7th:  Sheffield Wednesday vs. Cardiff City
15.00:  Premier League, 12th vs. 20th:  Watford vs. Aston Villa
15.00:  Premier League, 11th vs. 14th:  Everton vs. AFC Bournemouth
15.00:  Premier League, 19th vs. 16th:  Newcastle United vs. Crystal Palace
15.00:  Premier League, 10th vs. 17th:  Stoke City vs. Sunderland
15.00:  Premier League, 13th vs. 6th:  West Bromwich Albion vs. West Ham United
17.30:  Premier League, 4th vs. 18th:  Arsenal vs. Norwich City

STILL NOT SOLD:

ELSEWHERE (all times BST):
14.30:  Bundesliga, 1st vs. 5th:  Bayern Munich vs. Gladbach
14.30:  Bundesliga, 2nd vs. 10th:  BVB vs. Wolfsburg
14.30:  Bundesliga, 18th vs. 7th:  Hannover 96 vs. Schalke 04
15.00:  La Liga, 11th vs. 3rd:  Real Sociedad vs. Real Madrid
17.15:  La Liga, 2nd vs. 17th:  Atlético Madrid vs. Rayo Vallecano
17.30:  Bundesliga, 3rd vs. 4th:  Bayer Leverkusen vs. Hertha Berlin
19.30:  La Liga, 13th vs. 1st:  Real Betis vs. Barcelona
19.45:  Serie A, 8th vs. 5th:  Chievo vs. Fiorentina
20.00:  Ligue 1, 2nd vs. 17th:  Olympique Lyonnais vs. Gazélec Ajaccio
21.00:  MLS, 1st(E) vs. 2nd(W):  Montreal Impact vs. Colorado Rapids
21.00:  MLS, 9th(E) vs. 7th(W):  NYCFC vs. Vancouver Whitecaps
21.00:  MLS, 9th(W) vs. 8th(E):  Seattle Sounders vs. Columbus Crew SC
23.00:  Liga MX, 2nd vs. 1st:  Club América vs. Monterrey
02.06 (next day):  Liga MX, 5th v. 4th:  León vs. Pachuca
02.30 (next day):  Liga MX, 7th vs. 3rd:  Morelia vs. Santos Laguna