So that happened. It's the second time we've lost a meaningless game this season by a 3-0 scoreline. Way back in the summer, Werder Bremen spanked a half-interested Chelsea team 3-0 as well. John Terry gave away a penalty there, too. Mourinho might have instilled a winning mentality strong enough to walk the league, but we're still not very good at friendlies.
There was a moment of pure quality before all the madness and it came from Saido Berahino. A truly fantastic, un-savable strike. Courtois may have had a case of limp wrists on WBA's second and third goals, but he could only do this one a courtesy dive. Marvelous hit out of essentially nowhere.
After that spot of football, it was time for the main event. We had figured that this would be a mostly mellow occasion of Monday night kickabout, but we had forgotten that Diego Costa is the modern embodiment of Dennis "could start a fight in an empty room" Wise. Costa had been itching to get back on the pitch before the end of the season and it wasn't long before he was doing the usual Diego Costa things to West Brom's defenders. Eventually, unsurprisingly, a wrestling match broke out with Jonas Olsson around the half hour mark. Olsson went low, Costa went high. Referee Mike Jones only gave the latter a yellow. Before we could complain at that injustice, Cesc Fàbregas did something foolishly hilarious and hilariously foolish in the latest episode of his season-long quest to assault referees.
I haven't quite decided which is funnier, the accuracy of the punt or the outrage that followed it. He could've killed the lad! (Notice how Chris Brunt barely even remonstrates.) Jose, your thoughts?
Mourinho on Fabregas’ dismissal & ban. "Three game ban for this? Jesus Christ. Three game ban?! Of course it’s harsh." #cfc— Henry Winter (@henrywinter) May 18, 2015
Since Mr. Referee wrote this up as "violent" conduct, Cesc will now be suspended for three games, two of which will carry over to next season. Unless we appeal. Is Paul Scholes on the appeals panel? We might actually win this one! (LOL, no.)
So then it was 11-v-10 and while Chelsea still dominated possession — he said unenthusiastically — West Brom were the ones scoring all the goals. We conspired to hit our shots either straight at Boaz Myhill (right, Filipe Luis and Nemanja Matic?) or at Boaz Myhill's post instead. Probably not the best way to go about scoring.
When we look back on this game a few years from now, I wonder if we'll remember the sheer insanity of it all. Will we look at the scoreline and wonder, just what in the world happened? How did West Brom not win the Premier League this year? And just how did John Terry not get sent off this tackle? The referee clearly had a bet on JT playing every minute of every game this season!
In the end, the scoreline and the third loss of the league season hardly matters. The fact that West Brom scored some rather unlikely goals and we missed some rather glorious chances hardly matters.
xG map for West Brom - Chelsea. Really, all of that happened. pic.twitter.com/DzPwJlUc6M— Michael Caley (@MC_of_A) May 18, 2015
What matters is we've given some playing time to youngsters Ruben Loftus-Cheek, Nathan Aké, and Izzy Brown. That we brought a bit of entertainment into this dreary, dark, and depressing world.
And of course that we've won the league.