Up until about an hour ago, I thought it was Friday. Turns out, it's only Thursday. Fuuuuuntastic!
It's been my working theory for quite some time that Thursdays are the worst days. Granted, I've never experienced first-hand anything outside of the Gregorian calendar and the Western standard five-day workweek, but within the confines of those traditions, Thursdays are the worst. Except that one trimester at undergrad when I didn't have any Friday classes and the local pub had quarter beers on the night of every day that began with a T.
Some might argue that Mondays are the worst, but you know that there is no hope on Monday. Plus, you just had the weekend, you greedy person. So you buckle down and get to work. But on Thursday, you can almost smell the weekend. It's not quite Friday but close enough to feel like Friday. You wake up Thursday morning and you hope that it's Friday. As usual, it's the hope that kills.
Plus, Europa League. Thursday's the worst football day. So what do you do on Thursday? You read silly rumors. Sure, you might read silly rumors on other days, too, but on Thursdays, you read them and then you decide to write about them. Like I said, Thursdays are the worst.
"Bayern Munich are ready to step up their efforts to steal Branislav Ivanovic away from Chelsea this summer."
Is it really stealing if they're paying for him?
Here's what I think happened. Exactly one month ago, BILD ran a similar story, which then made its way into the English tabloids as well. Somebody at the Express then made a calendar reminder for a follow-up exactly one month later. Since presumably this whole story is bunk and there's been no subsequent rumors at all (beyond some silliness about Ivanovic's contract that expires in 2016), they ran a story about how Bayern are now "ready to step up" in their hunt. Perhaps a few weeks from now, they'll be mulling over a potential offer, or perhaps Chelsea will face a battle to keep the right back. You never know!
Speaking of which, here's the best part of all of this. ESPN picked up this story in their daily transfer roundup published under the ESPN Staff byline. We used to joke that ESPN Staff stood for Harry Harris's fever dreams, but this one's more of a link dump. Except for a little editor's note at the top, which may be the greatest thing ever written about Silly Season.
"The rumours are gaining steam and in many instances credibility. It's the sweet spot for Transfer Talk, where literally anything is possible as the summer window nears closer to opening with each passing day."
Literally! Literally anything's possible! Dogs, cats, meteors, the whole nine yards. With so much journalistic license so freely given, anything is indeed possible. Even credibility! Literally.
Bid away, Bayern!