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The Daily Hilario: Matchday 28-ish

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Your daily dose of off-topic shenanigans.

WE'VE WON THE LEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAGUE!
WE'VE WON THE LEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAGUE!
Clive Mason/Getty Images

WaFFLe (already in progress):
3rd vs. 8th:  Avalanche vs. Dynamo Hawkeye
6th vs. 1st:  Haz Mat Suits vs. Cahill for Jesus
12th vs. 4th:  West Staines Massiv vs. DP's All-Stars
9th vs. 11th:  Silent James & the Falcao Punch vs. In Hazardous Kompany
7th vs. 2nd:  Langers Athletic vs. Mother Hen Mourinho
5th vs. 10th:  B Tret vs. Cesc-y Jonjo Shnoz

SPRING TRAINING:
I'm flying down to Phoenix later today (Wednesday) to attend a few spring training games and engage in general mirth and merriment for the rest of the week.  Behave yourselves while I'm gone.

ENGLAND (all times GMT):
19.45:  Championship, 5th vs. 23rd:  Norwich City vs. Wigan Athletic
19.45:  Premier League, 18th vs. 3rd:  QPR vs. Arsenal
19.45:  Premier League, 9th vs. 1st:  West Ham United vs. CHELSEA
19.45:  Premier League, 2nd vs. 20th:  Manchester City vs. Leicester City
19.45:  Premier League, 11th vs. 4th:  Newcastle United vs. Manchester United
19.45:  Premier League, 10th vs. 14th:  Stoke City vs. Everton
19.45:  Premier League, 7th vs. 8th:  Tottenham Hotspur vs. Swansea City
20.00:  Premier League, 6th vs. 19th:  Liverpool vs. Burnley

MIDWEEK MUSIC MEDITATION:

ELSEWHERE (all times GMT):
18.00:  Coupe de France, quarterfinal:  PSG vs. Monaco
18.00:  DFB Pokal, round of 16:  RB Leipzig vs. Wolfsburg
19.00:  Copa del Rey, semifinal, second leg:  Villareal vs. Barcelona (1-3 agg.)
19.00:  Algarve Cup, Group B:  USA vs. Norway
19.30:  DFB Pokal, round of 16:  Bayern Munich vs. Eintracht Braunschweig
19.45:  Coppa Italia, semifinal, first leg:  Lazio vs. Napoli
21.00:  Copa del Rey, semifinal, second leg:  Espanyol vs. Athletic Bilbao (1-1 agg.)