Juan Cuadrado made his first appearance for Chelsea on Saturday, coming on off the bench during the late stages of the 2-1 win against Aston Villa and generally being reasonably tidy in possession and extremely energetic in helping Branislav Ivanovic defend. And the debutant has given us some quotes to play with.
And oh such quotes they are.
In fact, I run between 10km and 12km during a match and that is why after having played, I tend to go to sleep late. It’s because I still have all this adrenaline inside my body.
Ok, that makes sense. I have trouble sleeping after I'm pumped up about something too. What's next?
In the past, I had this nightmare in which I run and run – and a witch is running right behind me. When she is about to catch me, I get up. Up to now, she has not caught me yet.
So let me get this straight: you run so much that even when you sleep your dreams are tormented by some sort of evil athlete-sorceress who prevents you from resting forever? You must be really tired, Juan. My only repeating dream is of Darth Vader playing piano really energetically.
Between 'I go to battle; you come with me' and this interview I'm really enjoying what Chelsea's new signings have to say this season.