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Eden Hazard: 'I can cope ... as long as the tackles don't kill me'

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So when Jose Mourinho talks about how Eden Hazard is too nice and too honest when it comes to dealing with the tornado of kicks and fouls coming at him from all angles every time he steps onto the pitch, this is what the Chelsea manager means.

"Since I started football, defenders have always tried to kick me. I can cope with that, as long as the tackles don't kill me. This is football."

"Sometimes I try to keep going but I can't - the fouls are too hard and I have to go on the floor."

"But I don't think things have gone too far. If I create a lot, I can get fouls for free-kicks and penalties, so sometimes [being fouled] it's good. I always just want to score or make an assist, to make good things for the team."

-Eden Hazard; source: Evening Standard

In Eden Hazard's world, being the most fouled played in the Premier League, but not the player who has "won" the most yellow cards for the opposition, is ok because they haven't killed him yet.  "It's ok guys, not dead yet!"  "No, really, no worries, kick me again."  "Yes, it's fine, Mr. Referee, just let it go; I can still walk, see!"

I hate to break it to you, Eden, but that's not a limit that you can test realistically.  I mean, once you reach the point where the tackles have killed you, there's no going back.  You can't say, "oh, ok, that's gone too far, let's ease off a bit, shall we?" because, like, you know, you're dead!  Dead as a Marco van Basten football career.

I'm not saying Hazard should lose the refreshing attitude and get all divey on us.  But it would be nice to be able to rely on a bit of protection from the officials, rather than just hoping that his magic ankles filled with Bacta-blood and wishalloy bones remain strong and healthy for all eternity.