David Luiz talks Mourinho, Abramovich, and that night in Munich in the best interview ever

Sometimes an interview is so perfect, it needs no further commentary.  This is one of those times.

So, be sure to click over and read David Luiz's interview with Jason Burt of The Telegraph.  It's gloriously awesome.  Here are a few highlights.

On his desire to play in the Champions League final in 2012:

"I said to [Jason Palmer, Chelsea physio, who was trying to get the hamstring working]," Luiz recalls in hushed tones. " ‘You know how I worked hard in my life to be here? You know when I left my family I was 14-years-old? You know tomorrow there are 200 million Brazilians in the world and just one can be on the pitch? You know what it is for my life to be here? Then it's not for you to say something, to say I cannot play tomorrow. I will do the test but even if I fail you go to [the then manager Roberto] Di Matteo and say to him that I play tomorrow.'

"He said ‘no'. I said: ‘You go there and you say to him, if not, I kill you. And tomorrow we will be champions of Europe, no problem. Trust me.' And he did. Di Matteo came to my room and I said: ‘No problem boss, I play tomorrow and let's be champions of Europe.' "

On telling Roman to calm his farm:

"I went to the hotel lounge and Abramovich was there and he said: ‘How are you, how is the leg?' " Luiz recalls. "And I said: ‘No problem. Tomorrow I play with the head and the heart, so no problem.' And he said: ‘No, my God, I'm nervous,' and I'm like, ‘keep calm'."

On getting into Bastian Schweinsteiger's head:

"All the time I was saying it [that  we are going to win]. At the corner kick [Bastian] Schweinsteiger came to me to mark me and I said: ‘No problem, it's not me who will score.' And Didier scored. And Schweinsteiger looked at me as if to say ‘what the?' "

On the hair:

"The weather was so cold in Lisbon when I arrived [in 2007].  I came from Salvador, Bahia and I arrived in February on the last day of the transfer window. It was so cold and I decided ‘let's grow the hair to hide my ears'. And after that it became nice hair. Not very nice but people started to talk about that but it's just one more part of me."

On being more than just a footballer:

"First of all you have to be a great example as a human being. Footballers have a great opportunity to be a good example because the kids want to listen to you and be like you in many ways."

"It's like this - I don't know if you have kids but kids in football is a different person. Sometimes you tell a kid to go clean their teeth at night but if the dad says: ‘I wash my teeth every night at 10 o'clock.' Then the kid will do it if he likes me, for sure, he goes. I just give you an example. After that you have many things to do. Show them my character, my dignity, my position in society. Playing football is too small when you have a big opportunity like that to talk to millions in the world."

I could go on and on, but just go ahead and read it.  Some of it will be familiar -- he reiterates that he has no quarrel with Mourinho and talks once again about the end of his "cycle" with Chelsea -- but it's well worth your time.