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The Daily Hilario: Let the sunshine in

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Your daily dose of off-topic shenanigans.

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FOOTBALL (all times GMT):
18.00:  DFB Pokal, 2nd round:  BVB vs. Paderborn
19.30:  DFB Pokal, 2nd round:  Schalke 04 vs. Gladbach
19.30:  Copa del Rey, R. of 32, 1st leg:  Villanovense vs. Barcelona
19.45:  Serie A, 10th vs. 11th:  AC Milan vs. Chievo
19.45:  Serie A, 2nd vs. 14th:  AS Roma vs. Udinese
19.45:  Serie A, 6th vs. 12th:  Sassuolo vs. Juventus
19.45:  Capital One Cup, 4th round:  Manchester City vs. Crystal Palace
19.45:  Capital One Cup, 4th round:  Liverpool vs. AFC Bournemouth
19.45:  Capital One Cup, 4th round:  Southampton vs. Aston Villa
20.00:  Capital One Cup, 4th round:  Manchester United vs. Middlesbrough
23.30:  MLS, knockout round:  DC United vs. New England
02.00 (next day):  MLS, knockout round:  Seattle Sounders vs. LA Galaxy