A criminally underused word, razzmatazz. The Daily Mail used it in their story about the NFL's Regent Street sideshow on Sunday, complete with Oakland Raiders cheerleaders and wrinkly old Dan Marino; they're probably not wrong. Then again, it was probably better entertainment than the actual game. At least Lamar Miller grabbed a couple TDs for Miami, helping my fantasy team to a 4-0 start.
Razzmatazz is also when you have to make about a half a dozen trips to the facilities to say hi to the porcelain god. Hurray for this stomach flu... or some other kind of actual flu. Or something. Whatever it is. As long as it's not Ebola.
TURN DOWN FOR WHAT?!
I would also like to point out that this is an official MLB Instagram video. Because MLB gets social media more than, say, the Premier League. Then again, my dog gets social media better than the Premier League, and he doesn't even have opposable thumbs.
By the way, this was a bit like laughing after a funeral, as the Mariners were officially out of the playoff hunt at 2:46pm local time. Sometimes, laughter is the appropriate way to celebrate and remember.
FOOTBALL (all times BST):
18.00: Serie A, 4th vs. 18th: Udinese vs. Parma
19.45: Serie A, 16th vs. 17th: Palermo vs. Lazio
20.00: Premier League, 17th vs. 19th: Stoke City vs. Newcastle United