While I think Schalke manager Jens Keller had the best post-match quip, Mourinho wasn't too far behind with his two-word summation of the events that transpired at Stamford Bridge on Wednesday.
First, here's Keller:
Q: Was it a foul by Fabregas for Chelsea's goal? Jens Keller: '100%' Q: A foul on Fabregas for your goal? Keller [smiling] 'I didn't see it'— Sam Wallace (@SamWallaceIndy) September 17, 2014
Auditioning for that future Arsenal job, eh, Mr. Keller?
"It was frustrating because of the early goal but also because we had chances to make it 2-0 and we didn't. After it was 1-1 we had a fantastic reaction and chances to win the game, but that's football, that's the Champions League."
"Schalke came to get a point; when they found themselves at 1-1 they fought hard to keep the result. They had a good keeper and players making fantastic defensive clearances off the line."
"Congratulations to them for reaching their objective and yes, there is a bit of frustration for us because we did everything to win and we couldn't."
"In my opinion we made two mistakes; one was to not make a foul when they recovered the ball. The other was the fact I told my players 20 times [Julian] Draxler likes to come inside on his right foot and [Sidney] Sam wanted to come inside on his left foot, we had to close inside."
Ramires not taking one for the team? That's football. Cahill backing down and letting Huntelaar face the goal with space and time enough to shift the ball easily onto his favored right? That's football. Fabregas committing a foul and then scoring? That's football. Fabregas getting fouled and then Schalke scoring? That's football.
"...in the last 15 minutes Remy could have scored, Terry could have scored, Hazard could have scored, but that's football."
And all those other unconverted chances? That's football, too. Sixteen shots from inside the area with just one goal, recalling long-repressed memories of facing 19th Century West Ham and that Sunderland match that ended Mourinho's Premier League unbeaten streak at Stamford Bridge? That's football as well.
Football sure sucks sometimes.
But hey, at least it's a point, right?
"It's not a fantastic point for us but it's a point. In a short competition of six matches, one point is a point you get and two points that your opponent doesn't get."
With NK Maribor vs. Sporting Lisbon also finishing 1-1, Group G has effectively been reduced to an unbalanced five-game schedule. Not the worst place to be at all. Just like football.