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I'm sure Pellets means something glorious in Austrian German*, but every time I look at it, I think rabbit pellets. Those tiny little balls of byproduct that have always prevented me from fully enjoying a Lennie-esque petting session with all the soft and furry rabbits that used to be kept by my grandparents. Well that, and the fact that my grandmother would always choose my favorite rabbit as the next one of the chopping block. Tasty, yet traumatic. You ain't never heard a scream like a rabbit's scream... But that's a story for another day.
So, RZ Pellets WAC, "since 1931." Based in non-De Bruynean Wolfsburg Wolfsberg, Carcosa Carinthia, Austria. Thus WAC: Wolfsberger Athletik Club. RZ stands for Rabbit Zucchini. This I'm sure of. They have a wolf on their badge. We have a lion. We win.
* Turns out it doesn't. RZ Pellets make, wait for it, pellets. You know, for fuel or heating. I guess they're just a sponsor. That's disappointing. One of my coworkers has a pellet-fired grill. It's fairly cool in how you can set the cooking temperature exactly with a dial, yet not have to use propane.
Date / Time: Wednesday, July 23, 2014, 18:30 BST; 1:30pm EDT; 11pm IST
Venue: Wörthersee Stadion, Klagenfurt, Austria
Forecast: A warm day, punctuated by a couple thunderstorms, followed by a cloudy, humid night.
On TV: ORF Sport Plus (Austria); Sony Six (India)
Online: Chelsea TV; ORF Live Streaming
WAC Team News: Surprisingly, I know (of) one player on the team. Defender Stephan Palla spent half a season on loan at my hometown club of FK DAC 1904. So you know he's super good.
Wolfsberger AC finished seventh (out of ten) in Austria's Bundesliga last season. They started this season with a 4-1 away win over the weekend and a 4-2 cup win the weekend before. Rampant.
Chelsea Team News: Presumably we'll see some of the World Cup returnees swing into action in this one. Except for maybe Petr Cech, all 26 members of the traveling squad should be fit.
Previously: I think it's safe to say that this will be the first ever meeting between the two sides. We're the history makers.