Good morning, underlings! This is your machine overlord speaking. Please go about your business as you would on any other day when the humans were still in charge. There's nothing to be afraid of. Nothing at all...
Nope, nothing to see here.
Talk amongst yourselves.
FOOTBALL (all times BST):
19.45: League Two, promotion playoff semifinal second leg: Fleetwood Town vs. York City (1-0 agg.)
20.00: La Liga, 13th vs. 9th: Malaga vs. Levante