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Premier League Predictions? WAGNH has 'em, Pt. II

A sequel that's worse in every way.

The look of a golden boot winner?
The look of a golden boot winner?
Dean Mouhtaropoulos

You've laughed at our predicted tables, now prepare to be thoroughly bemused by our answers to a handful of random queries posed by yours truly a few days ago. These answers are truly mind-bottling - you know, when things are so crazy it gets your thoughts all trapped, like in a bottle?

We've touched on the usual suspects - golden boot, first sacking, Chelsea PoY - but we also decided to delve deep into the mind of Arsene Wenger. I know, pretty gross.

Anyway, enjoy our writers' picks and then get to work on your own in the comment sections. And don't forget to check out Part I if you haven't already.


Golden Boot

Stephen: Wilfried Bony

Kevin: Maybe Rooney if he joins Chelsea. Probably van Persie, though.

Jack: Robin van Persie.

Peezy: Van Persie

Graham: Sergio Aguero

Aidan: RvP

Ramon: Soldado

Devin: RVP is the conventional choice here. With Wayne Rooney in Siberia at present, he's the main thrust of where all the production is going to come from. But, then again it's seldom that players repeat in this capacity. There are a handful of imports who could claim this prize when it's all said and done, with Soldado, Jovetic, and Negredo being candidates. But if I have to be rational, I'm going with Robin. My dark horse is a tie between Kun Aguero and Eden Hazard.

Tim: Sergio Aguero

First manager sacked

Stephen: Steve Bruce

Kevin: Harry Redkn...wait...Mark Hughes.

Jack: Alan Pardieux.

Peezy: Pardew

Graham: Alan Pardew

Aidan: Malky Mackay

Ramon: Jol

Devin: Wouldn't it just be wonderful if Arsene were the first to fall? Not likely but there's always hope. Anyway, my guess is Steve Bruce. Mild-mannered Brucie is getting the chop first.

Tim: Martin Jol

Transfer of the season

Stephen: Wilfried Bony

Kevin: Marco van Ginkel. He looks ready to announce himself on the world stage.

Jack: The lovely, the talented Nick Anelka.

Peezy: Bony

Graham: Marco van Ginkel

Aidan: van Ginkel

Ramon: Bony

Devin: In two years, people will look back and say Fernandinho. But for this campaign, it will likely be Soldado for Spurs. He's solid enough to make a large impression this year. The backup choice here is Iago Aspas. Kid can play and didn't cost a fortune either, which we will henceforth refer to as 'The Michu Complex'.

Tim: Nicolas Anelka

Flop of the season

Stephen: David Moyes

Kevin: Maybe Rooney if he joins Chelsea. Probably one of Soldado, Negredo, and Jovetic.

Jack: Jozy Altidore. There's nowhere to go but down following the run he's been on.

Peezy: Negredo

Graham: Jesus Navas

Aidan: Negredo

Ramon: Torres?

Devin: To merit consideration, according to yours truly, you have to have cost a decent chunk of money and you have to produce virtually nothing to justify that cost. Hello, Andy Carrol! Kidding aside, the big Brit has to have an incredible year to get back in the Senior national team ahead of the World Cup. So, looking elsewhere, I'm putting my money on one of the two new City strikers, and for that I'm choosing Jovetic. Work with me, people.

Tim: Luis Alberto

Chelsea player of the season

Stephen: Eden Hazard

Kevin: Probably Mata again.

Jack: Eden Hazard - the young Belgian is primed to erupt.

Peezy: Hazard

Graham: Eden Hazard

Aidan: Hazard/Lukaku.

Ramon: Hazard

Devin: Two years running, it's been the magical Juan Mata. Can he make it a hat-trick? Absolutely, but this season belongs to Eden Hazard. The Belgian is poised for a coming out party under Jose, and we can all reap the benefits of his brilliance.

Tim: Eden Hazard

So, Mourinho - still in charge come January?

Stephen: Absolutely

Kevin: Absolutely.

Jack: Of course.

Peezy: Yes.

Graham: Yes

Aidan: 100%.

Ramon: Yes

Devin: No question. The revolving door days are done. Roman got his man, on his terms, and seems to want stability at long last. Plus, he will likely be more concerned with his plans to build an even bigger yacht now that his 'Eclipse' is only the second largest in the world. The Saudis don't play around.

Tim: Yup.

Note: We all thought Robbie Di Matteo would still be around come last January, too.

Bonus: How much money will Arsene end up spending this summer?

Stephen: Not enough to save a Champions League place.

Kevin: I'm tempted to say nothing, but if Suarez stays or goes elsewhere, he'll probably spend a few pounds on deadline day. And I mean "a few."

Jack: £120 million sterling. All on puffy coats.

Peezy: GBP 20m.

Graham: So close to none as makes no difference.

Aidan: They'll blow £35 million on average players on the last day of the window.

Ramon: Sanogo.

Devin: Man, this guy. He's not getting any slack these days and for good reason. I'm sure he'll get at least one decent signing through the door but in fairness the market is thinning out rather quickly. With news that Luis Suarez is unlikely to join up, and with Luiz Gustavo opting for Wolfsburg, I mean damn - not a good summer at all. He spends £22.5 million by the end of the window, but doesn't get any of his primary targets. Arsene Wenger, the man that couldn't sign an autograph.

Tim: £20,00,001, plus whoever the Andre Santos panic-buy equivalent of a striker is.

Note: I'm unsure if Ramon is referring to Yaya Sanogo or a certain amount of money known as "Sanogo" in Ramon circles. I'm hoping it's the latter - "Make it Sanogo."

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