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We all love Rafael Benitez. Wait, that's not right - let me start again.
We all hate Rafael Benitez. So, with that in mind, the We Ain't Got No History family got together earlier today in the hope of creating a Rafa drinking game. What emerged from this meeting of the minds was that you don't really need a game to drink when Rafa is in charge. Hell, I've been drinking since he was installed as interim manager.
It's not a game, my friends - it's called depression.
Instead we moved on to far more enlightening fare, Japanese poetry to be exact.
The Haiku is perhaps overused - as well as overstated - in modern society but remains a thoroughly insightful medium. Graham got us started with a piece that cuts at the very fabric of the art (note the progressive structure) before the rest of us got involved, all lovely poetic ventures in their own right.
Enough of the fancy talk, though. Without further ado, here are our tributes to some tubby waiter from Spain. Oh, and make sure to add your own Rafa-centric haiku to the discussion below.
Graham:
[Fun] you you stupid [fun]face
You manage
Like I write haikus
Steve:
Start Torres, don't score
Swap David Luiz for Cahill
No goals, Chelsea lose
Kevin:
Haikus are fun, sir,
Unlike your awful tactics.
You are a disgrace.
Lamin:
You're a thief of joy.
You're a thief of joy, oh yes.
You're a thief of joy.
Jack:
Rafa in London?
A Bridge swept into darkness
Pour me another
Guest post:
Torres Torres Tor
es Torres Torres Torres
Torres Torres LOSS
A late edition from D. Pizzle:
[Fun] you, Benitez
[Fun] you, Rafa Benitez
[Fun] you, Benitez