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Breaking down SB Nation's Premier League Power Rankings: Chelsea still first, City closing in

Not good.
Not good.

Another week of SB Nation Premier League power rankings (check them out here). Another week of me being stark raving mad.

Actually, I’m not that mad. Just disappointed. Remember when your parents used to say that to you and you felt even more awful than if they were just furious with you? Yeah, those were the days.

Anyway. While the SB Nation Electoral College has come around somewhat from last week’s debacle, they still have yet to show much respect to the Albion. Yes, West Bromwich Albion still find themselves outside of the Champions League places in Week 3. I mean, I know these are power rankings – and I’m glad to see our distinguished voters moving WBA somewhat up the ladder – but I really have no problem thinking Steve Clarke’s boys could do the proverbial business against Arsenal right now. Yeah, I said it.

Let’s move on to the rest of the rankings, shall we?

1. Chelsea (Average ranking 1.53, Last week 1.33) – The top three remain unchanged and it’s hard to argue otherwise. Good to the college overlooking the Chels’ flaccid outing in Monaco, as that has nothing to do with the Premier League. NOTHING, I say. Bravo, sirs and madams.

2. Manchester City (1.66, 2.13) – City still aren’t in a rhythm. And yet they are creating chances for fun. Edin and Carlitos looked excellent against QPR. Wait until Kun returns and the rest of the guys find their footing. Wack.

3. Manchester United (2.93, 2.66) – I woke up with 15 minutes to play in this match. Robin van Persie promptly made me vomit. Enough said.

4. Arsenal (4.93, 6.06) – A win at Anfield. Huge. Wait, no it’s not. Still, Arsenal are deserving of a high ranking. Who would have thought this club, with this kind of defensive personnel, would yet to have conceded a goal? Impressive.

5. Everton (5.13, 4.47) – Being bagged by the Baggies suddenly isn’t a bad thing. Everton still have six points from nine; that’s six more points than they usually have at this stage of the season.

6. Swansea City (6.00, 6.27) –MICHU. Bless you. No, I didn’t sneeze.

7. West Bromwich Albion (6.40, 10.40) – Seven points from nine with that slate of fixtures to open the season? As Sly would say, I want to take you higher.

8. Newcastle (8.53, 8.07) – Mike Ashley didn’t sell anyone in the summer window. I repeat: Mike Ashley didn’t sell anyone in the summer window. That’s reason enough to be optimistic if you’re a Geordie – and, of course, it’s definitely enough to keep Newcastle in the European mix of the power rankings.

9. Tottenham Hotspur (8.80, 8.20) – Quick, let’s all have a laugh at Spurs before they start winning matches. Based on their deadline transfer dealings, that should start rather soon. Maybe.

10. Sunderland (9.73, 10.60) – Rising two places into the to half are Los Gatos Negros. Steven Fletcher may actually be worth the £30-odd million Martin O’Neill coughed up for him. I sense a revolution on Tyneside. It smells of rich mahogany.

T11. Fulham (12.27, 9.13) – Moussa bolts for Tottenham, and the roof figuratively caves in at Craven Cottage. You see, Craven Cottage has no roof. Shocking, I know. Fulham looked excellent through two matches, but with their creative fulcrum departing, it’s difficult to see how Martin Jol and his merry old men carve a path into the top half. Spot-on ranking, this.

T11. Wigan Athletic (12.27, 13.80) – Moving on up. The Latics jump three spots thanks to a nice point at the Britannia. No, I don’t think it was cold or at night, but it’s still a good result. Whether Roberto Martinez can keep this side afloat remains to be seen, but at the moment, this is a deserving landing for them in the rankings.

13. Liverpool (12.7, 10.07) – Ha.

14. West Ham (12.86, 16.27) – I still don’t like West Ham. However, Big Sam does what Big Sam does. Andy Carroll might actually score a few goals this season. Lay off the sauce, young man.

15. Stoke City (13.13, 13.20) – A right bore these guys. Just about where they deserve to be.

16. Aston Villa (16.60, 18.20) – No longer in the relegation zone, though that’s not really saying all that much. Marginal business at the deadline aside, this side looks bland. Petition to bring back The Heskey. I still think Paul Lambert will conjure up some magic, though.

17. Reading (16.87, 15.27) – The Royals slip two places despite not playing. Poor lot. Add in the lack of transfer activity at the deadline, and it hasn’t been a great week for Reading. Especially not when your promoted rivals are locking up Gaston Ramires and Andy Carroll.

18. Southampton (17.07, 17.00) – How Southampton aren’t a tad higher in these rankings is a bit bemusing. Despite sitting bottom in the true table, they’ve put together a pair of excellent showings, against the Manchesters no less, and probably deserved something against Wigan. They’re scoring goals, too. Plus, you know, Gaston Ramirez. Maybe I’m reaching?

19. Norwich City (18.13, 18.20) – That Robert Snodgrass, he looks a shrewd signing. But, seriously, where is the quality? I can’t see Norwich moving from the bottom two at all this season.

20. QPR (19.00, 18.40) – I still maintain that Rangers are a despicable lot. However, I also maintain that they’re a far better side than Norwich – or Reading, Villa and the like. For Christ’s sake, Mark Hughes somehow convinced Esteban Granero to join up. Even with substantial wages, that’s a catch.

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