Like the cat, majestic and proud
Your days at Liverpool made fans cheer loud
But when Roman’s riches knocked at your door
Your mercurial play turned piss poor
For years faithful fans have offered their backing
But even the loyal ones now call for your sacking
There is nothing wrong with a good long rest
It rejuvenates the mind, and brings out your best
Unfortunately game time is when you choose to slumber
And as a result your days are of finite number
It is schürrle a shame that you have wasted your time
At a club so lovely and sublime
With our team you will earn no extension
In our nonexistent history you will have no mention
When your time is up just let it be
Hell we’ll even let you leave on a free
When that day comes, where will you go?
Maybe back home to Atletico?
Maybe a team across the sea
Sounders, Red Bulls, LA Galaxy?
Whether or not you continue to play
These are the thoughts that I must say
One thing is certain, and that is this
Your performances have ensured that you will not be missed