The wind chill from the sea was unbearable, the frosty snow that had crept into my fur boots had reduced me to a shivering mass. An overwhelming feeling of isolation had begun to take place, as a traversed the frozen Siberian landscape. I came upon a hulking object. For a good distance, it was impossible to make out what it was, but as I moved ever close it became increasingly apparent. I was looking at the Eclipse, Roman Abramovich's super yacht. I was not greeted by anyone, instead a long platinum plank extended from the side of the vessel, on the plank was a pure gold briefcase containing 100 million worth of gold bars. On the briefcase was a note from Abramovich explaining my challenge of building the team, and an apology for not letting me in, the reason being my smell of poverty was too much to bear. Suddenly a black helicopter appeared above, with a thin ladder dangling from it. I climbed it only to be greeted by Yossi Benayoun, with Marko Marin flying the helicopter. I said not one word to the hobbits, for they and I need the task that was at hand.
Transfers in: Thiago (18 million), Lazar Markovic (8 Million), Edinson Cavani (45 Million), Luke Shaw (12 Million), Marquinhos (30 Million).
Transfers Out: Demba Ba (10 million), Marko Marin (5 Million)
Total Spent: 98 Million
Thiago (from Barcelona): All these proposed moves are with the assumption that Mourinho institutes a 4-3-3. With this in mind, the purchase of Thiago becomes obvious, his buyout clause is insanely low for a player of his quality. He's Barca bred, so his passing skills are sublime, and he has experience in a midfield. Granted, a Barca midfield three allows for the midifelders to merrily prance about, but he's still defensively competent, especially effective at overwhelming ball carriers with hounding pressure. His positioning could use tweaking, but not to the point where it's a crippling issue. At 22, Thiago needs a place where he can play week in and week out, and that's Chelsea. Combine that with a need for a midfielder and it's a perfect fit.
Lazar Markovic (from Partizan Belgrade): What a brilliant, brilliant player. Having finally got around to watching Markovic's games this year I've come away extremely impressed. His pace, combined with close control make him a nightmare for defenses. Fully capable of playing on the wing or as a withdraw striker I see him as being a potential star. We should keep him in the first team at least until January, and then loan him out if he's not getting the required playing time.
Edinson Cavani (from Napoli): Cavani has become my favorite striker in the world over the past two years. Hardworking, capable of linking up, and lethal finisher his inspired performances for Napoli are astounding. With his reign in Naples coming to an end, its time for Chelsea to swoop in and secure us a star striker. With Cavani leading the line, Chelsea should realize their full attacking potential.
Luke Shaw (from Southampton): I love Ryan Bertrand, I really do, but I have real trouble seeing him as a successor Ashley Cole. He's a solid squad player, but not someone I'd like to see haul in 55 matches a year. That certain someone would be Luke Shaw, a stud of a left back playing for Southampton. It's not just Shaw's speed that makes him a premier prospect, it's his defensive positioning and crossing ability. Strong positional awareness, and a propensity to link up with his wing partner give him the look of a young Ashley Cole, or a current day Leighton Baines.
Marquinhos (from Roma): The transfer market is running a bit short right now on premier center back prospects, however Marquinhos represents a top class player. For 30 million we can get a sure fire center back partner for David Luiz, giving us an elite (Brazilian) defensive backbone for years to come. Technical but also physical, Marquinhos resembles in many way our very own David Luiz. His solid defensive positioning is well beyond his years and has the capability of pulling a special skill out of his back pocket at any time. On par with Real Madrid's Raphael Varane, Marquinhos is a tremendous player we can't afford to pass up.
Demba Ba (to PSG): The PSG thing is a guess on my part, but we should consider selling our syrup loving striker this offseason. I don't mind Ba, and I certainly enjoy his penchant for the spectacular, but many times this season his performances haven't been on par. Now many will certainly scream that this is true of Torres (and it is), but the fact of the matter is that there is little to no chance of Torres getting sold, his salary and contract length simply prohibits this. It's a little harsh on Ba, but with Cavani and Lukaku coming in, either one of Torres and Ba needed to be sold, and Ba is the easiest to do so.
Marko Marin (to Borussia Moenchengladbachosacdcosdhvuvo): Gladbach could use some attacking talent to partner with Patrick Hermann, and Marin still provides this. Marin isn't a poor player, not even close, but the physicality and pace of the EPL can be difficult when you aren't blessed with the sublime skills of Juan Mata. Marin's size and stature prohibited him from being effective for Chelsea. A return to the Bundesliga would be the best option for Marin and his career going foreword.
Romelu Lukaku (back to Chelsea): The hulking man mountain proved worthy of a Chelsea starting place this year at West Bromwich Albion. Showing an improved sense of positioning and technique, the Belgian beast terrorized Premier league defenses all year. A return to Chelsea should be on the cards, having Lukaku slide right behind Cavani on the depth chart. Given that we usual play upwards of 60 games a year this should provide Lukaku with plenty of time to showcase his unique talents.
Kevin De Bruyne (back to Chelsea): De Bruyne kept the Werder Bremen attack afloat all year, displaying incredible passing range and playmaking ability. This year we often had to rely on Benayoun to come off the bench in the later stages of games, having De Bruyne as a depth option would go along way to moving Chelsea back to the top of the premier league. De Bruyne could slot into the midfield three vs. weaker sides and move out on the wing against more quality opposition.
Michael Essien (back to Chelsea): I was worried we had seen the last of the Bison after his loan to Real Madrid, fortunately he showed to still be able to play at a high level, earning regular spots at right back. Considering the 4-3-3, Essien could see a good bit of form if he moves into the midfield as a box-to-box player. Of course we wont see the stupefying form of old but he could be a more than capable player in that role.
Loans (all teams are hypothetically good fits):
Patrick Van Aanholt to Granada
Thomas Kalas to Stuttgart
Wallace to Vitesse
Nathan Ake to Vitesse
Josh McEachran to Crystal Palace
Nathaniel Chalobah to Hull City
Billy Clifford to Burnley
Rueben Loftus Cheek to Nottingham Forest
Todd Kane to Huddersfield Town
Ulises Davila to Real Zaragoza
Lucas Piazon to Malaga
Kenneth Omeruo to PSV Eindhoven
And finally, here's how I could see them line up next year.