Luis Suarez apologises

Alex Livesey

Hey remember when Luis Suarez bit Branislav Ivanovic, stayed on the pitch, and scored a last-second equaliser to deny Chelsea three points at Anfield? Sure you do, because that was a few hours ago. Well guess what everyone! He's apologising for it!

Great! It's just the matter of taking back his goal and giving Chelsea a 2-1 win then, right? Right? What do you mean that's not going to happen? That even if he doesn't get away with it and receives a lengthy ban, which he will now that he's admitted it, Chelsea -- the club affected by his actions -- won't benefit? Well this is pretty pointless then, isn't it?

You're not sorry, Suarez. If you were sorry you wouldn't have pretended as though Ivanovic had fouled you and started pleading for a penalty. You're only 'sorry' now because you got away with it and were able to change the game at the death. Go bite yourself.

Here's the full statement from Liverpool, if you want more things to roll your eyes at.

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