In shocking news, infamous red top the Sun, which would be one of the first targets of my divine fire if I somehow found out that I was Zeus incarnate, has made up a story about Chelsea. Specifically, they've made up a story about Andre Villas-Boas demanding that the team celebrate with him when they score goals. I'm not going to link to them because goodness knows they don't deserve the hits, but that story spread like wildfire and saw Villas-Boas the target of bemused mockery from pundits who really ought to have known better.
Apparently, the boss was as annoyed as I was about all of this, which was probably rather the point, and he made a point of making sure everyone knew the story was a load of nonsense:
I would never ask my players to come and celebrate a goal with me. Goal celebrations are for the players. I told The Sun that they should get the money back from their informant because it is incorrect. What was said to the players is that when they score a goal, they can see that the bench is going through the same emotions as them. It is very unfair that the story was poorly portrayed in that way.
I didn't mention the story when it was first sent my way because I simply couldn't believe that a 33-year-old man who is as good as his job as Villas-Boas is would be so obviously needy - it read far more like an attempted character assassination on the Sun's part than anything else. Surprise! It was. If you believed that... well, you should have known better.